Nobody Wins By Playing Small


The great, indomitable RuPaul sang those very lyrics up there in her song Champion. It’s a phrase I’ve had going over my head the past few days, too. I’m on vacation right now, which might actually be the oddest time to start a blog, but being away from home has gotten me thinking about a lot of things – especially what I want out of life. It feels as though I’ve spent the better part of the last decade floundering, trying to find myself, only to find that I’m just out of reach. (I mean, can one actually be out of reach with oneself? I’m not sure, but it does certainly feel like it sometimes.) I’ve tried on many hats these past few years – potential cosmetologist (and who knew how much geometry was involved in cutting hair?!); paralegal student (not as glamourous as it sounded, let me assure you); wannabe business analyst (which I’m not actually sure I have the smarts for?); computer forensics guy (this I blame on Barbara Gordon, one of the greatest comic book heroines of all time); and a host of other hats. None of them were quite the right fit. Then, recently, it hit me.

Fashion. It’s always been my great love. (Well, next to kick-ass comic book superheroines, Diet Coke, men, dance, and melodramatic Hindi films.) It’s always been the one thing that excites me and frustrates me, as all the things that one loves is wont to do. It’s also one of the things that I struggled with – first as a skinny gay boy trying to figure out what it meant to be, you know, gay – and later as a chubby gay man frustrated with the fact that fashion simply doesn’t cater to my body type of dangerous, vivacious curves. (Okay, yes, fine, I’ve teetered off the edge of chubdom and into obesity, but let me have my moment of cute and sassy, alright?)

But this isn’t strictly going to be a plus-sized men’s fashion blog. (Mostly because I’m still trying to figure out what works best on a plus sized man that’s not some hideous shent [shirt + tent = shent] or, worse, sweatpants.Honestly, if I had a whit of sewing capability, and the ability to math, I could maybe move into that some day. Who knows? I mean, we bigger dudes definitely need more of a style statement than Men’s Wearhouse and Casual Male XL. Seriously, thank god for Gap’s deep V-neck t-shirts that come in a XXXL Tall. Comfortable, stylish, can be dressed up or down, those things are a godsend and practically all that I live in.) More, this blog is going to be about playing with fashion, and how non-heteronormative dudes like myself (or heck, even style-adventurous heteronormative dudes unlike myself) can do that with flair and fun. After all fashion – as well as one’s own personal style – has to say something, and have some sort of point of view. It’s an art form and it should be fun – not the dullsville jeans-and-t-shirt or suit-and-tie trap we’ve been thrown into ever since societal norms took away our powdered wigs and high heeled shoes. (Not that powdered wigs or high heeled shoes are going to show up here any time soon, but you get my gist.) It’s about giving men’s fashion a little bit of stylish sparkle and playful, whimsical wit.